August 16, 2023

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BG’s Positively Speaking

“It’s All About YOU!”

That’s right, I said it, “It’s all about you,” AND I encourage you to go out and tell everyone you meet that it’s “all about me(you).” That mantra, meant to be a put-down of the ‘ME’ generation, is now, in many circles, considered good to say about yourself. Maybe you are wondering why? Let me explain:

It’s because you’re making a public admission that who you are or are not, what you are or are not, where you are or are not in life, it’s all down to you. If you don’t have what you could have or are not the person you could be, it’s because of you. Understand that you can’t fix what you don’t confess; you must take responsibility for your life. Once you do that, you can start correcting your situation. I should admit that at one point in my life, I came face to face with this realization. If I’d kicked the butt of the person most responsible for my failures, I wouldn’t have sat for a month.

Having accepted your own culpability, you now need to acknowledge two things. First, you are where you are because of the choices you make. Secondly, you cannot change your situation without the help of others. To gain that help, we must start considering those who can help us more. To place a higher value on them and encourage them to be their best. It would help if you also made better choices, one’s that are not focussed entirely on what’s good for you. Your goals will be attained quicker and more securely if they add value to those around you and not just to you. Becoming the person you could become is all about you …….

Looking Ourward … Not Inward

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Fetch A Nice Price

I took a stuffed dog to the Antiques Roadshow and was told, “This is extremely rare. Do you know what it would fetch in good condition?” “I Dunno,” I said, “Maybe A stick?”

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Where Are You?
If you are looking at this magnificent view

(Hover over or tap the picture for the answer)

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Editors Quote Book

When the winds of change blow, some people build walls, and others build windmills.

— Chinese Proverb

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Laundromat Reunion

Two elderly ladies meet at the laundromat after not seeing one another for some time. After inquiring about each other’s health, one asked how the other’s husband was doing. “Oh! Ted died last week. He went out to the garden to dig up a cabbage for dinner, had a heart attack and dropped down dead right there in the middle of the vegetable patch!” “Oh dear! I’m so very sorry,” replied her friend. “What did you do?” “Opened a can of peas instead.”

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The Maids Revenge

Just after the maid had been fired. She took five bucks from her purse and threw it to Fido, the family dog. When asked why by her former employer, she answered, “I never forget a friend. This was for all the help he gave me in cleaning the dishes.

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Trivia Quiz

(Click Question For Answer)

 

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Your Horoscope

For Amusement Only

ARIES Mar. 21-Apr. 19: You will be called on to give moral support to a close friend. Step up and do what you know is right.

TAURUS Apr. 20-May 20:  Younger siblings will try your patience. Use your powers of persuasion to win them over to your side.

GEMINI May 21-June 20:   Conservative investing will yield more satisfactory results than unnecessary risks. Heed the warnings of others.

CANCER June 21-July 22: A positive approach to an unusual situation will lead to great results. A unique offer brings unexpected results.

LEO July 23-Aug 22:   Don’t give up on your ideas for a particular project. Keep after the powers that be. They’ll eventually listen.

VIRGO Aug. 23-Sept. 22:   Seeking a new relationship? Change the places you go and the things you do. Meet new people. You never know!

LIBRA Sept. 23-Oct. 22:  Putting your thoughts down on paper will help you see more clearly what you want from your life.

SCORPIO Oct. 23-Nov. 21:   Tempers flair, and you are in the middle. Remain calm. Your composure will lead to the ultimate resolution.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22-Dec. 21:  Something you have sought for a long time is now in sight. Don’t be overanxious and make a costly mistake.

CAPRICORN Dec. 22-Jan. 19:   Look for quality projects you can share with your family. You have been neglecting them; it’s time to change that.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20-Feb. 18: Good advice is not always taken but should be seriously considered. Don’t just casually brush it aside.

PISCES Feb. 19-Mar. 20:   Take some ‘ME’ time. Catch up on the things you want to do and maybe some of what you need to do.

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Quickies

• I walked into a bakery and asked the lady at the register if I could buy a bagel with cream cheese. “Sorry,” she replied. “We only accept cash.”
• A fly with a bug on its back said, “hey, is that a mite?”
• The mite replied, “I mite be”.The fly replied, “that’s the worst joke I’ve ever heard!”
• The mite said, “well, I came up with it on the fly!”
• I took my dog to the park today to play frisbee with him…He was useless! I need a flatter dog!
• I phoned my wife earlier and asked if she wanted me to pick up Fish and Chips on my way home from work, but she just grunted at me… I think she still regrets letting me name the twins!

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A Wise Man

An elderly gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began. The next afternoon, three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash can they encountered. The crashing percussion continued daily until, finally, the man decided it was time to take action.

The following day he met the youngsters and said, “I really like to see you youngsters pounding the heck out of the bins; I did the same when I was your age. If you keep it up, I will pay you each a dollar a day to continue. He faithfully paid the boys a dollar a day for the next four weeks. At the start of week five, he met the boys with a sad look on his face saying, “Inflation has taken a big piece of my income. As a result, I will only be able to pay you 50 cents a day each.”  The boys looked at each other and then at the man in disgust and said, “We aren’t going to use all our energy banging these bins for 50 cents each; we quit.”  The man turned to go back to his home, confident in knowing that he could return to the peaceful enjoyment of his retirement.

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The Surgeon

The surgeon entered the room and advised his patient that a brain transplant was the only remedy. “Fortunately,” he continued, “this hospital has perfected the procedure, however, it is not yet available through OHIP and you will therefore have to pay.We have two brains in stock at the moment, a female brain costing $30,000 and a male brain at $100,000.”

“Why is the male brain so expensive?” asked the patient.

“Oh, that’s easy,” said the surgeon, “male brains are hardly used.”

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The Last Word

The same people who laugh at science fiction,
listen intently to weather forecasts and economists.

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